i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
