i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
