i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'
i was like PREG?
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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