there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
Randomize
