So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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