I wish I could punch you in the face.
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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