I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
Randomize
