ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
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