Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
i think i have two assholes
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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