I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
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