The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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