oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
