they need to just BURY HIM!
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
