Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
