How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Randomize
