yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
