Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Randomize
