The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
