apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
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