Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
