Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
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