I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
This is the prime rib incident all over again
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
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