you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
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