I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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