How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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