The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
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