he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
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