I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
