Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Randomize
