I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Randomize
