I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
I cut my penus on the lid.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
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