i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize
