how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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