took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
i think my cat just said my name.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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