Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
