I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
