Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
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