on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
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