So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
