They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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