Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Randomize
