I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
