when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
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