we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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