I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
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