Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
