You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize
