I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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