matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
