Well apparently he's into motor boating.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
I always "accidentally" drop a condom and make sure she sees it's a magnum. By the time I'm inside her and she realizes how small I am, it's all over in a flash and I'm done. Plus, they never call back so I never have to see the girl ever again. #gratefulforprematuretinypenis
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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