Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
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