I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Randomize
